By Korina Moss
I can’t help myself – I’m one of those people who always makes at least one New Year’s resolution. Wishful thinking, perhaps? I prefer the term hopeful thinking. This year, one of my resolutions is to have more work-life balance.
Now that my son is a college student, it’s just me at home, so the only schedule I have to adhere to is my own. Sounds divine, except it allows me to get into my modes. Yes, I meant to write modes, not moods (although they can be pesky too). I have work mode and relax mode and I have a hard time transitioning between the two. (This doesn’t include veg out mode, which happens pretty much every night.) When I’m working on a book, which has (thankfully) been continuous over the past three years, it’s mentally all-encompassing for me. I’m always thinking about it, even if I have to push it to the back of my mind. I’ve been mentally living in my series’ fictional town of Yarrow Glen with my protagonist Willa and her Curds & Whey cheese shop crew since the spring of 2020, and it’s not easy to pull myself out.
This is especially true when I’m in crunch mode, as I was just a couple of months ago when my deadline for Fondue or Die, book 5 in my Cheese Shop Mystery series, was fast approaching. I’d been in a concentrated writing mode for the four months prior, trying to turn my sketchy outline and underwritten first draft into a worthy manuscript. As the deadline got closer, I was also in heavy publicity mode for my newly released book 4, Case of the Bleus. Last fall, I had three out-of-state appearances, plus book signings, and all the extra online marketing that comes with a new release (blogs, interviews, and podcasts). So, I was in crunch mode squared.
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| Signing books at the St Louis Cozy Con |
Once my manuscript was submitted and the publicity machine wound down, I immediately turned to thinking about book 6, wanting to get an outline done before the Fondue or Die revision suggestions would come back from my editor in mid-January. I had a couple of weeks to brainstorm and outline before my son came home for his college semester break. Then I promised myself (and him) I’d take a break for the holidays. I even took time off from my early morning part-time job.
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| Book 5 in my Cheese Shop Mystery series |
The first few days of switching off work mode, I felt mentally restless. I was so used to the constant thoughts of my books or my social media marketing, it was a tougher transition than I’d expected. I made an effort to post and scroll on social media significantly less frequently. I told myself it was okay if I didn’t keep up with everything that was happening in the mystery writing community. Although the habits were hard to break, what a relief it was! I was so much more mentally present. I stayed up late and slept in! (Not compared to my 19-year-old son, but both times were later for me.) I fell into a happy relax mode. My son and I made some short overnight trips and had a great holiday break, and when he left for his ski trip with his dad, I felt rejuvenated and ready to get back to work!
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| Macy's in Herald Square, NYC |
Alas, my relax mode was no less stubborn to leave behind than work mode had been two weeks prior. My alarm clock was waking me up at 5:45 AM, but I was not ready to relinquish my newfound mode. The book I’d been outlining was tapping me on the shoulder to come up with those final chapters, but my muse was also in no hurry to get back to work. Now that it’s been a couple of weeks, slowly but surely, I’m easing back into it. My New Year’s resolution for more work-life balance may be a little harder to achieve than anticipated, but then again, I’ve always done too much hopeful thinking.
Did you make any New Year's resolutions for this year?
I got into tired mode reading all your modes, but understanding the need to balance them all. That’s the key, as you found with the time with your son- balance. No resolutions here- just balancing one foot in front of the other.
ReplyDeleteIt really can be hard to switch between modes. It's why Mondays are such a struggle. Friday, too, quite often, since I am ready to be in relaxed mode. Okay, maybe it's not quite as much of a struggle for me to go back to relaxed mode. But part of my relaxed mode is reviewer mode, so is that really relaxed?
ReplyDeleteAw, yes. Balance. That's on my list of goals for 2024 as well. I have a looming deadline, but once this book is turned in, I shouldn't have my foot constantly on the accelerator for a while. (Ha!)
ReplyDeleteI wrote our January 2 blog on my goal-setting process. What I sensed in your blog was not so much work/life balance as forgetting the major purpose of vacation is to help us renew and recharge. Doing that allows the work time to be more productive and so the vacation pays for itself.
ReplyDeleteAfter I am done working for the day and while on vacation, I allow my subconscious to work if it wants, but it can't report back in until I'm back at work. That works for me, but it took some time to learn how to do it.
Best of luck with your resolution.
Balance is a big goal for me this year, as I want to spend more time enjoying my husband's retirement with him. We want to do more traveling before we are too old to see the world. My daughter is getting married in April, so my yearly pledge to slim down has me sticking to my pledge!
ReplyDeleteBalancing work and down-time is a hard one, especially when you have a deadline driving you. Good luck with that.
ReplyDeleteI mostly write short stories, and when I'm in the midst of one, I have trouble making it vacate my mind enough to do much else until it's "done" (is a piece ever "done?" Even when I read my published pieces, my mind goes into "revision mode." Rather uselessly.) and put it aside to stew in the back of my mind. How much more encompassing when it's a longer work like a novel! Sounds like you're mastering balance pretty well.
ReplyDeleteYou are still my role model. Your mojo will return – it always does. Leaving relax mode behind is the most difficult transition – it feels so good! Happy New Year.
ReplyDeleteI learned to write fast and hard toward a November 15th goal, then stop until January 1st. No more holiday season guilt trips. The six weeks off have charged me enough to finish my current WIP.
ReplyDeleteBalance is definitely where life should be. It's tough, but you just use your excellent mind to make it happen.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the support, everyone. Glad to know I'm not alone.
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