I have long believed that you
should use caution in showing your skills even when you enjoy whatever it is
that makes you stand out in your particular area. Once you demonstrate your abilities, you can expect to be
asked to apply them over and over again.
As a therapist, I tended to get caseloads full of clients other
therapists did not want to work with.
As much as you want
to help people, you cannot do it if you neglect yourself. For example, people with frequent suicidal
ideation require a level of attention and care that can drain energy from
therapists. Having more than one
or two people with suicidal ideation in a caseload is an invitation to burn
out.
You might think that mental health
professionals would be more patient and understanding of people with behaviors
that wear on others. You would, of
course, be wrong. I’ve had clients
who had a genius for pissing people off.
Although, there are people who enjoy what is clinically known as
“stirring the shit,” dealing with them was largely a matter of recognizing what
they were up to and removing the payoff they desired. The very most irritating people
acted out of anxiety. They knew
very well that what they did annoyed people. The harder they tried to relate, the more annoying they
became. Staying empathic was not
easy.
If you have skills, people will
notice. When that happens you don’t want to convey the impression that what you
do is easy. I did a number of
psychological evaluations for a co-worker who was a social worker. Once he said, “I don’t know if I should
thank you or the test.” I don’t
remember my response. I should have
retrieved the testing materials and carried them into his office. Then I should have said, “You can do
the next evaluation. The instructions
come with the tests.”
COMPETENC
What is your experience with
competence?
If you are going to fess up to competence, one you need to have or or quickly develop is the ability to say no.
ReplyDelete~ Jim
Warren, like Jim said, you need to have the ability to say no. Unfortunately, I find that difficult to do, but I am getting better at it, but it's still hard to turn people down when they ask for your help. Could it be the first child syndrome where I felt somewhat responsible for my younger siblings?
ReplyDeleteThis is akin to the saying, "When you need something done quickly and correctly, look for a busy person to do it."
ReplyDeleteI've found that being too competent at work usually leads to a promotion accompanied by long hours and lots of stress.
ReplyDelete