How Do I Describe Thee? by Lori Roberts Herbst

My husband and I just returned from a two-week road trip that took us through Wyoming and Montana and into Alberta, Canada. We visited Banff and Jasper National Parks, as well as making a return trip to Glacier National Park, Yellowstone, and the Grand Tetons. It was a much-needed respite, and it was filled with so much beauty. The trip prompted an idea for a scene in which Callie, the protagonist in my Callie Cassidy Mystery series, ponders whether her constant exposure to such gorgeous vistas in her mountainside hometown will ever become mundane.

After over six decades of life, the answer to Callie’s question, at least for me, is a resounding no. When I’m surrounded by mountains, or forests, or oceans, I still find myself catching my breath and counting my blessings. I don’t believe I’ll ever develop an immunity to the wonders of the world.

It’s true, though, that embracing the beauty requires effort on my part — a mindfulness, a presence. To appreciate my surroundings, I must first notice them. And as I transition from tourist into writer, the question becomes: how do I share those sights with readers? 

For me, it’s a daunting task. Action scenes? I can handle them. Dialogue? Let me at it. But description? It’s an area in which I often feel woefully inadequate.

How do I convey all the shades of green in the forest? The pops of gold and orange and red as the leaves change in the mountains? The azure blue of the sky over a meadow? How do I show the shimmer of sunlight in the reflection of a lake? If even photographs can’t do the sights justice, how can my words?

My tendency as I address the issue is to overwrite, as if more is better. Then, I remind myself to think like a reader. When I’m immersed in a novel, I want to be provided with just enough description to allow me to visualize the outline of a scene, but I don’t want to be sidetracked by too much verbiage. Give me enough that I can feel the peace (or chaos) of a place, but not so much that I get so busy deciphering the language and am sucked out of the story. Allow me, as a reader, to do some of the heavy lifting by using my own imagination.

The same is true with characters. I enjoy it most when an author gives me a few key descriptors so I have an idea of age, general body type, hair color. But I don’t want or need to be apprised of every minor detail. Leave it to me to fill in the blanks for myself. It helps me become part of the story, to walk in the setting alongside the characters I’ve helped create.

That is the challenge, one that makes me thankful there’s an editing process.

Writers, what advice do you have about writing description? Readers, how much is too much?

The Callie Cassidy Mystery series is available on Amazon Kindle, Kindle Unlimited, and paperback.

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Lori Roberts Herbst writes the Callie Cassidy Mysteries, a cozy mystery series set in Rock Creek Village, Colorado, and the soon-to-be-released Seahorse Bay Mysteries, set in a Texas cruise port town. To find out more and to sign up for her newsletter, go to www.lorirobertsherbst.com