Saturday, April 11, 2026

Dispelling the Myth: Being an Author is a NOT Lonely Life (Opportunities Abound to Make Friends)

By Lisa Malice, Ph.D.

For generations, the stereotypical life of a writer was that of a lonely one, featuring an isolated wretch tucked away in a dark, dusty room typing away in an exasperating process of putting words on paper, ripping up uninspired paragraphs, if not whole chapters, until, at last, the story is not just complete, but perfect. A masterpiece worthy of praise and honors.

As writers in a contemporary world, that is far from reality. Sure, we do spend a lot of time alone, crafting and editing our characters and their stories. But our words won’t see the light of day without other writers being part of our writing journey.

This is a truth I learned early in my writing career from a local mystery author, Kathy Hogan Trochek, who made it New York Times-big when she switched genres to write southern women’s fiction under the pen name Mary Kay Andrews. She was headlining a library luncheon when I approached her to sign my book. When I told her I was working on my first mystery, Mary Kay told me to join three organizations, Sisters in Crime (SinC), Mystery Writers of America (MWA), and Romance Writers of America. Being active in these groups, she said, would give me all the support for learning to write and publish my work.

Mary Kay spoke the truth. Over the years, the people I met and worked with during local chapter meetings, sponsored workshops, conferences, book signings, festivals, and more, provided me with the support I needed to craft, pitch, publish and sell my debut psychological thriller, Lest She Forget. With the help of my friends, my book skyrocketed to the Amazon bestseller list for thrillers on its launch day and remained there for its debut month. My three-minutes of fame on local TV that first day I owe to a fellow author I met through International Thriller Writers who hosts Tampa Bay Reads on our local Fox affiliate.

Like any published author, building relationships with readers is also key to my success, and these are connections in which I revel. Whenever and however I meet them . . . chatting up books at a Barnes & Noble signing or a community book festival . . . discussing the intricacies of my characters with a neighborhood book club . . . sharing a break in the hospitality suite with a die-hard mystery fan at a crime-fiction convention . . . even meeting up at the gym . . . it’s a joy to share in the love of a good story of mystery, suspense, and thrills. (Selling a book is merely an added bonus, which usually brings to my reader’s face, too!).

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The most challenging time for all writers during my journey was the first two years of the COVID shut down, leaving everyone feeling disconnected and depressed. In-person events, chapter meetings, conferences, book festivals, and hardest of all, book launches were cancelled.

Thankfully, technology came to the rescue. Skype, Zoom, Google Meet, and other video conferencing platforms brought us all back together again, and in some cases, extended our reach. Sisters in Crime, for example, made a deal with Zoom to provide its platform to all its chapters, which allowed its national members to become local chapter members anywhere in the world. For national members with no local chapter in their area, this proved to be a great asset.

The rise in virtual competency has fueled opportunities for authors to connect with readers across the country, especially with online book clubs. Delta Sigma Nu, the business fraternity my kids joined in college, hosts such an event monthly to bring together alumni from all across the world who share a love of books; my daughter, Olivia, snagged a spot on the calendar for me to share discuss Lest She Forget with the club shortly after its launch.

As another example, Karen Dionne and Hank Phillippi Ryan saw the need for programming that offered interaction with book authors and created The Back Room, a virtual 90-minute book club meeting every other Sunday evening that brings together readers to chat with four authors hawking their latest books. Learn more at www.The-Back-Room.org. Rogue Reads, a monthly book chat hosted by Rogue Women Writers (www.RogueWomenWriters.com), similarly grew out of the need to connect authors and readers during the pandemic.

 JAMES GRIPPANDO, LISA MALICE, DUANE SWIERCZYNSKI & STEPHEN HUNTER start the New Year with New Books

This is all great, but at the same time, people are yearning for more in-person connections. Companies that relied on its employees to do their jobs virtually are now requiring people to return to the office, in part, to rebuild what can’t be fostered with people who never see each other face-to-face—teams of employees, interconnected and working well together not just because they share linked jobs, but more intertwined because they share their lives with personal conversations, celebrating birthday, enjoying lunches and other outings, that is, they are friends and not just co-workers.

This primal need to connect in-person is building among our writers’ organizations. A recent survey of my state chapter of MWA, for example, shows that members are eager to have more local events and gatherings, that is, a chance to get to know one another in-person. This sentiment holds fast especially with those people who rarely attend chapter meetings and events. As a result, there are plans in the works to create more regional groups within our state to offer members opportunities to build personal, and more meaningful, connections to each other.  That should help grow the memberships in the area, as well, further building those critical connections for success as a writer.

I look forward to seeing this movement for personal connections grow in my own area.

How about you? How did the rise of virtual conferencing impact you personally or professionally? What do you like about it? What is missing? How are your local organizations working to make their members more connected?

 

 

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