If you are interested in blogging or want to promote your book, please contact E. B. Davis at writerswhokill@gmail.com.


Our reason for creating WWK originated as an outlet for our love of reading and writing mystery fiction. We hope you love it, too, and will enjoy our holiday gifts to our readers with original short stories to celebrate the season. Starting on 11/16 stories by Warren Bull, Margaret S. Hamilton, Paula Gail Benson, Linda Rodriguez, KM Rockwood, Gloria Alden, and E. B. Davis will appear every Thursday into the New Year.


Our November Author Interviews: 11/8--Ellen Byron, and 11/15--Sujata Massey. Please join us in welcoming these authors to WWK.


November Saturday Bloggers: 11/4 Margaret S. Hamilton and 11/11 Cheryl Hollon.


Congratulations to our writers for the following publications:

Shari Randall's "Pets" will be included in Chesapeake Crimes: Fur, Feathers, and Felonies anthology, which will be published in 2018. In the same anthology "Rasputin," KM Rockwood's short story, will also be published. Her short story "Goldie" will be published in the Busted anthology, which will be released by Level Best Books on April 25th.


In addition, our prolific KM will have the following shorts published as well: "Making Tracks" in Passport to Murder, Bouchercon anthology, October 2017 and "Turkey Underfoot," just published, will appear in the anthology The Killer Wore Cranberry: a Fifth Course of Chaos.


James M. Jackson's 4th book in the Seamus McCree series, Doubtful Relations, is now available. His novella "Low Tide at Tybee" appears February 7 as part of Lowcountry Crimes: Four Novellas, which is available for order.

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Thursday, January 27, 2011

SOUL MATES

Valentine’s Day approaches and I’ve embarked on a story that needs a love interest for my protagonist so I thought I’d look into the stud muffin question. I’m not a romance writer and I tend to prefer character actors over stereotypical leading men so I could create someone that not all women drool over. That could be a marketing problem but if a person can’t be authentic in their sex life where can they be authentic?clip-art-8

I was going to say that my idea of the ideal man has changed over time but maybe it’s only my idea of ideal external characteristics that has changed. Today, movies for teenagers suggest the dream teenage male is a tortured soul and a vampire or a werewolf. I expect most teenage girls still have their own idea of the perfect mate. Since most of my family has light coloring, as a teenager I preferred Mediterranean looks. An Arab would have provided the perfect coloring contrast, and I never considered the chasm between our backgrounds.

Like many adolescents, I did prefer rebels, especially if they had a cause. Romeo and Juliet and Westside Story suggest young women often look with favor on males their families don’t like. Could they be searching for someone different and therefore more interesting?

I have always believed that a person’s choice of mate is very individual, tied to memories, character, and wishes beyond what another person can grasp. Persons who attempt to interfere with freedom of choice in love I see as kin to the Taliban. Secondly, why would anyone want to take on the responsibility of condemning another to a miserable sex life?

Men and women help to create each other. Even the strongest man is influenced by what the woman he desires thinks. Even the most independent woman listens to the man she desires. Most couples I know have changed each other over time. I have one female relative who won every battle and lost the war in changing her mate. Another relative successfully molded her partners to her needs. Would you give up your favorite hobby for your mate? Would you sit through movies you hate to keep your mate company?

Just as adolescents tend to like rebels, I think many women have an interest in men with a dark side. Heathcliff and Rhett Butler come to mind. They’re not perfect. Danger and excitement seem to surround them. They’re not society’s darlings. Imagine having a mother who keeps setting you up with doctors and dentists. I know there are those who think women are put on earth to be wonderful mothers of perfect kids but I guess I’m not the only woman in the world who spends time thinking about subjects that don’t anchor her to home and security.

Main characters in police and medical series appeal because they are using their brains and taking action. They’re also often easy on the eye. In fiction, I don’t care if a man has crooked teeth or is less than six feet tall as long as he does his best in the situation in which he finds himself. The two men in Stephanie Plum’s life are, according to Stephanie, handsome but they are also brave val12and take active, helpful roles in the story. I imagine there are women who like brooding, silent men—modern day Marcel Prousts sitting alone in their rooms, especially if these men create art, music, or literature. I’d worry about being sacrificed to the man’s gift.

And I still haven’t discovered the perfect interest for my protagonist so I’ll just have to wait to see who presents himself. Do you think fantasy and reality meet in our choices of mate? Do we stop seeing the person we live with as someone separate from ourselves? Are you still searching for a soul mate?

21 comments:

Dee Hendershot Gatrell said...

I found mine years ago. But I believe we have more than one soul mate. Doesn't have to be a romantic soul mate--could be a relative or a good friend.
As for your character--he'll just show up in your head one day and you'll know who he is!
Dee

Warren Bull said...

I'm definitely spoken for, not that I would meet anybody's standards except, hers. I had a niece whose boyfriend had a shaved head, tattoos on his arms and multiple earrings. She agonized, "What can't people treat him like everybody else?" I did not reply, recognizing that the question was rhetorical

Pauline Alldred said...

Dee, I think you're right about soul mates. When I was younger and studying history, I used to think figures in the past spoke to me.

And Warren, isn't it great when you realize at least one person finds you special? As the saying goes, there's no accounting for taste.

Lynn M said...

Well when I was a youth I liked Spock from Star Trek, and Apollo from Battlestar Galactica, Vincent from the TV Show "Beauty and the Beast" and Work from Star Trek: Next Generation. When I finally left fiction and found my husband -- he had aspects of all these characters ... unfortunately he died ... now I have to include Wolverine from X-men -- nearly immortal! well at least he heals quickly!

Lynn M said...

oops Worf from ST:NG -- where was my editor when I needed her!

Pauline Alldred said...

Hi Lynn, I liked Spock. I haven't followed the X-men. I'll have to check out Wolverine. My husband wasn't like my teenage idols but he did resemble heroes I read about in my thirties and forties.

morganalyx said...

I met my soul mate back in high school. However, neither of us realized how perfect we were for each other until 23 years later. We each had other lives & loves, & only reconnected within the last couple of years.

Yes, looks & interests are one aspect of attraction, but I think the sign of a true soul mate is someone who sees every facet of you (including the "marred" bits) & loves you because of & in spite of them. Even better is if they're willing to help you work out the rough bits in your psyche.

I agree with Dee though, your hero will present himself to you & everything will click.

Good luck, Pauline.

Pauline Alldred said...

Wow, twenty-three years! I agree, soul mates are as accepting as mothers but more able to work on making the best changes to habits and personality.

Polly said...

I do write romance and suspense, and I fall in love with my male characters every time. I wouldn't be happy with them if I didn't. I think if they were men in my real life, I'd have to say they weren't the trouble. But we write fiction, don't we? The whole point is to create someone who isn't really real.

Allene said...

Sometimes soul mates come in disguise. The man I have been married to for 50 years is not the one I envisioned in my romantic youth. And there have been times, during those 50 years, that I would have gleefully pushed him off a cliff. I have come to realize that he is the one that challenges me, that pushes me to be who I am, never lets me give up on my dreams. He ignites my passion in more ways than the bedroom. The time is arriving when one of us won't be there for morning coffee. I am sure that if it is he I will have lived my life with my soul mate - I would hope he would think the same.

Lynn M said...

Allene -- that is beautiful and having watched my parents who will celebrate 49 years this summer ... yes they do love and support each other (though I am sure they would like to have seen that cliff at some point) they are a great example to the rest of us!

E. B. Davis said...

I don't really believe in soul mates. Relationships take a lot of work, individual soul searching, marital fights, etc. until you work everything through and come out the other side. Good thing no one said it would be easy. I met my husband when he was 11 and I was 15. Ten years later, we started dating and then married. After twenty-seven years of marriage, I still can't call him soul mate, but I can call him husband and friend. And that's not bad!

towriteistowrite said...

I met my husband in a writing practice group. We were both in out late forties, never married. In our early fifties, we married. It was romantic, but we were old enough to know we would need more than romance for a successful relationship.

I subscribe to the view espoused by medical intuitive Caroline Myss: a soul mate is the person who is so much like you that he drives you crazy and thus requires you to work on your own issues.

Pauline Alldred said...

Allene and Lynn, my husband died young and I felt I'd lost so much. Sometimes I had only good memories to get me through daily tasks. As you say, Elaine, husband and friend isn't bad.

Hi Polly, I'm hoping to create a male who brings out another side of my protagonist.

Pauline Alldred said...

towriteistowrite - I'd never heard that before about a soul mate being so much like you that you had to work on your own issues. Of course, you could deny your own issues and only see them in the other.

Warren Bull said...

All day I've been expecting comments like, "Gee, Warren, There must be lots of women who would be your soul mate." (if I were interested, which I am not.)
Either I am being a little too open on this blog or the readers have exceptional insight.

E. B. Davis said...

LOL! Warren-We'll have to send you a few Valentine's when the day roll around.

Pauline Alldred said...

Well, Warren, was that a rhetorical question? No one's speaking

Warren Bull said...

I just confirmed with the light of my life that she is my soul mate. It may be a mutually shared delusion but who cares?

Ellis Vidler said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ellis Vidler said...

What interesting comments! Lots of stories here. I was just going to say I really need to fall for the heroes in my romantic suspense novels. I have one that just isn't doing it for me, and the book keeps floundering. I've changed him so many times he's a stranger. Maybe I need to pick a face from something and see if he talks to me. Pauline, let us know how you do with yours.